scrappin', yellin' & mixin' it up
words from 111 archer avenue.
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i always wanted to be a tenenbaum
you, know?
i am a twenty-three year old darling girl.
i am not married, i have no children, and i didn't graduate from college. but..
i draw birds and robots; i read books; i laugh till i cry; i love until my heart bursts; i sometimes paint my face or arms with stripes if i'm bored; i create; i play guitar. i am not impressive, but i am me.
i am addicted to Jesus Christ. He never stops loving, never stops giving, and there is always more of Him. He is the perfect addiction. no one else can satisfy.
These are all just mostly vague details. If you want me, come find me. But, I promise, at the very least, you'll think I'm nice.
things i like
(and i like a lot of things).
museums.// theme parks.// zoos.// aquariums.// road trips.// naps.// reading, and lots of reading. especially in unconventional places.// being silly.// going to goodwill to find hidden treasures.// traveling.// new things.// vintage things. record players, records, old cameras, old radios, vintage clothes, etc.// learning new things.// exploring new places.// building forts out of pillows and/or blankets.// getting mail.// finding new ways to stay organized.// old books that smell like yummy old books.// the smell of colored pencils, and crayons.// the internet, for without it, i might not have some very great friends that i love so dearly.// squirrels.// musicals.// live plays.// daisies, and trees.// thai food.// laughing.// socks.// people you meet that are so amazing they make you strive for greatness, not in competition, but just out of the pure fact that you've seen potential, and was found to be wasting yours.// living a simple life.// holding hands.// the rare moments in life where i don't feel self conscious.// watching home videos.// hideabeds.// thrift stores the size of target.// target for that matter.// poking people in the nose and saying "beep" at the same time.// candles and lanterns and kerosene lamps.// cupcakes.// showers, washing my hands, and brushing my teeth.// sitting on rooftops.// the feel of new shirts.// warm, summer nights.// making things for people.// old shoes from friends.// macaroni and cheese.// having great times of talk with God.// organic, antibiotic-free, preservative-free, artificial flavoring/color-free, no refined sugar or grain food. (just the way God intended.)// love.
things i listen to
currently:
death cab for cutie. feist. animal collective. modest mouse. owen. iron & wine. mother mother. eisley. her space holiday. school of seven bells. dear and the headlights. the weepies. arcade fire. the format.
and when my heart needs to beat
t-pain. rhianna. jay-z. kanye west. flo-rida. ne-yo. justin timberlake. (all hopefully edited.)
things i watch
when life slows for a moment.
the office. my boys. saturday night live. arrested development.
cinema light
that makes my heart glow
the royal tenenbaums. dedication. juno. stranger than fiction. hook. eternal sunshine. garden state. empire of the sun. caddyshack. ghostbusters. jurassic park. closer. iron giant. turner & hooch. an affair to remember. eagle vs. shark. lars and the real girl. pineapple express. the life aquatic. (500) days of summer. the hangover. up. and in all honesty, avatar in 3D was pretty amazing.
paper and ink
with feelings and thought
cars & trucks & things that go - richard scarry
little bear - maurice sendak
the giving tree - shel silverstein
the quietest cricket - eric carle
there is a monster at the end of this book - grover
crazylove - francis chan
awake - erwin raphael mcmanus
seizing your divine moment - erwin raphael mcmanus
the journey towards relevance - kary oberbrunner
no compromise - melody green
but you can't raise boys to be scared of life.
You got to brew some recklessness into them.
The Lord has always been the One who stirs hearts to give of their resources and primarily I am asking Him to stir up those who will financially sow as partners with His kingdom advancing in and through my life.
Please take time to prayerfully consider becoming a monthly financial partner, allowing the Lord to pour through you, as He is the Source of all provision.
One-time donations are very helpful. Relational monthly partners who want to share in what God is doing in and through my life will provide enabling to focus wholeheartedly on His Word and His ways.
If you want to use another method besides paypal to help donate, let me know.
Contributions made directly to me are "love contributions," and are NOT tax deductible.
the archives
click to read back through the years.
2009 (may and after - there's a weird glitch)
2009 (january-april)
2008
2007
2006
2005
2004
half is missing.
Friday, May 29, 2009 @ 11:55 PM
Just because something could be worse
Doesn’t mean it’s right
Even though nothing’s really wrong
I can’t sleep at night
I’ve tried too many years
To end up here
With nothing to show
And no one to hold
There’s all I ever wanted
And all I’ve gotten instead
It’s not so bad
It’s just that half is missing
so.
things are back on a new plane.
i'm back and forth between school again.
i want to go, i really do. and i want to be back with paige, and kristin, and bethany, and everyone.
but i'm really liking my job. i really like what i do. (now at least.) i really like all the new task delegations and the way the office is running. and it's good money and good experience.
am i willing to leave all that so i can go back to school for a few years?
i'd be missing the birth of my niece/nephew. i'd be missing out on what i love doing at work. i'd miss my parents. (i know. totally lame, but totally true.)
but.
at the same time, i'm willing to miss out on all the new experiences, new people, and new education just because i have a job i like? that's too conditional. there are days where i won't like my job. and i can't keep putting my education and future on hold because of sideline stuff.
i just don't want to go and realize i should have stayed or stayed and end up desperately wishing i had an out.
i'm just not a risk taker. i'm sure it's surprising. i like adventure and i like silly things, but i am not courageous when it comes to making life decisions of this caliber. this isn't a choose your own adventure book... i can't jump ahead to page 88 and check to see if it was a good move or if i'm going to get eaten by a crocodile while my jeep gets stolen by columbian bandits.
there isn't a going back. this is full steam ahead type of commitment.
i don't know. i get so excited about going, and then i get so excited about staying.
so what do i do?
where do i go?
i doubt you can answer that. i can barely answer it for myself much less thinking about doing it for someone else.
but i know there is a pull to ames. from a lot of people. and it'd be nice to be back "home".
i just don't know.
and i'm not finding any guidance in any real direction. all i'm noticing is that i'm hitting every damn speedbump possible for trying to go back to school.
1. no money.
2. okay fine, you have money, but now you have to get fafsa filled out.
3. fafsa's done, but you gotta apply now.
4. oh good, application is in... let's wait 9 weeks for it to get back to me.
5. rejected from state school.
6. apartment doesn't work out anymore.
7. could maybe get into dmacc.
8. have to go back to ankeny for placement tests.
9. can skip placement tests if i get my act scores in.
10. order act scores and pay more money to priority them to my house. they still take a week to arrive and only come a day before the originals.
11. attempt to fax it to dmacc with expectations of getting an e-mail of acceptance "quickly" like the lady said.
12. find out more than a week later that the fax was never received.
i mean honestly.
i'm just waiting to be rejected from dmacc.
if i got rejected from community college, i think i might have to drop off the grid entirely. i wouldn't be able to handle it.
so if that's all supposed to be some big cosmic sign, then it all points to not going back to ames.
or, it's a sign that i'm supposed to keep fighting it because you only receive the most resistance when you're doing the right thing.
no matter how you cut it, i'm still completely out of answers.
i have only a few months.. even weeks left to sort this all out.
i pray that God gives me his wisdom. he says we don't have because we don't ask, and that whatever we ask in His name is ours. plus, i'm thinking it also says that he gives out wisdom freely. i'm not sure. that just sounds familiar.
so i guess that's my next step.
and from there, i'll keep moving one foot at a time in front of the other until i reach one destination or the other.
it's the only thing i've got.
you gotta keep moving, even if you don't know where to go. 1 comments
read it back to me, pietro.
good reads or good websites.
Team Van Voorst - Paige updates her life as wife, mom, and general frugal lady!
LG & Brian Alsbury - LisaGrace writes about being a new wife, matters of the heart, budgets and goals, and general awesome things.
Changing Again - Insight to Danielle's crazy world.
The Alexanders - Jess and Mike moved to Japan. Here is their side of the world.
Simple Mom - A great website devoted to simplicity.
Remodeling This Life. - Simple. Frugal. Fabulous. (She did an AMAZING home remodel based soley on cash.)
Mint - The EASIEST, most-AMAZING, FREE way to build a budget.
design*sponge. - Creative and original design ideas.
Organizing Your Way. - A personalized approach to decluttering your life.
SmittenKitchen - Seriously some of the BEST recipes i've ever come across. SO awesome.
go, mordecai!
good buys.
rare bird finds. - a collection of unique items.
fredflare! - a shop full of fun and functionality.
[etsy] - if you want anything handmade or vintage, look here.
mighty goods. - an updated collection of fun things.
threadless. - tshirts designed by everyday people.
raygun. - formerly smash, this is an independant shop in des moines that specializes in awesome shirts.
wildcat. wild...cat.
other good websites.
questionable content. - my favorite webcomic by jeph jacques. (contains swearing and adult situations.)
postsecret. - updated every sunday, this blog contains secrets sent in by individuals all over the world.
cute overload. - bad day? stare at picture of cute things. it helps.
is that a tic-tac?
layout credit.
Design : everlastingroses!
Inspiration : indreamsmaybe
Image : swimchick